I didn’t think I’d find a set of swizzle sticks at the first shop I checked necessarily, but I still couldn’t find a set at the second or third or even the ninth or tenth place. In fact, most people I asked had no idea what I was talking about — cocktail twizzler sticks? — and one woman at Pier One wanted me and everyone else in the store to know that she had no idea what I was talking about BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T DRINK, and she said it just like that, with the caps lock on, with as much disgust as if I had just asked her if they sold edible panties. I tried to explain that swizzle sticks are the long, skinny utensils you use to stir a cocktail, and I am not even making this up, she goes, "You mean, a spoon?"

What is this spoon you speak of?

[more via dooce]