did i miss somewhere that it's Operate Your Motor Vehicle Like A Moron season? really, i just need you out of my way and then i'll be fine. sheesh.

people, I am a firm believer that you can make time for the things you care about. but there's no use in trying to cram your week so full of good things that those good things turn sour.

selah.

- via rachel

ding ding ding.

i'm trying to live life in an anti-busy way. with so many people around me who are far busier, i feel a little lazy sometimes. but it keeps me sane and grounded and that's enough reason for me.

now, i fully realize that i have far less responsibilities than many others, so i have the liberty to say no and take time for myself. and i think i'll take advantage of that for as long as i can.

boss on vacation. uninterrupted stretches of work. and sometimes play. yesssssss.

so it's probably not a good sign when you don't even have enough space to run a disk defragmentation, yeah?

henceforth known as monday 2.0.

"It is no good asking for a simple religion. After all, real things are not simple.

[...]

'I'm ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don't accept His claim to be God'... is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic -- on a level with the man who says he is a poached egg -- or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God: or else a madman or something worse. You can shut Him up for a fool, you can spit at Him and kill Him as a demon; or you can fall at His feet and call Him Lord and God. But let us not come with any patronising nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to."

- from Mere Christianity, C. S. Lewis

i had lunch with a friend the other day, and she remarked once again how she likes that i am "real". i suppose i should have clarified to be sure she does not in fact have imaginary friends, but i'm pretty sure i know what she meant. and i take that remark as a high compliment. now, i may not always announce what i'm thinking -- my inner monologue is frighteningly active -- but if you ask me specifically, it's unlikely i'll pull any punches. aside from some quirks and idiosyncracies, what you see is pretty much what you get around here. although some people might get more than others...

a few weeks ago i had what could be described as an "accidental accountability" experience with a close friend. it was surreal; bizarre. one moment, we were sitting around watching television; the next, we were sharing vulnerabilities that very few others knew about ourselves. let me tell you: it doesn't get more authentic than that. maybe it was the smirnoff. more likely it was trust. sharing yourself with another person requires a great deal of it, and amazingly, it is returned to you a hundredfold.

brokenness is a humbling thing. 

"Our depressions, jealousies, narcissism, and failures are not at odds with the spiritual life. Indeed, they are essential to it. When tended, they prevent the spirit from zooming off into the ozone of perfectionism and spiritual pride."  -  Brennan Manning

i often wonder why it's such a struggle for us to be authentic. life isn't always shiny and happy, so why do we act the part? i mean, let's face it: we've all got problems. i think part of our struggle is that we've lost what it means to live in community. we are a collective of individuality. i don't need you; i can do it on my own. everything's fine. except we were created for interaction, for relationships. connectedness. to act like we've got it all together is to deny our own brokenness...

it is late for my brain. for real. my apologies for the lack of cohesion. 

someday soon i will post something with, like, actual paragraphs and paragraph breaks and substance. really.

kt on her standardized test scores: "i was very much always better at the verbal section."

jared on my white chili: "fun, but not annoying."

i'm thinking i have strange friends.