mdog : u n l e a s h e d

thus far:

- made sherried mushroom chicken [holy mother -- it was good]
- cleaned resulting kitchen mess
- took out the trash
- did two loads of laundry
- took down garland and lights [yes, i know -- it's now mid-march]

will be:
- making a few phone calls
- reading bird by bird

Posted on Friday, March 16, 2007 at 08:33PM by

mdog |

6 Comments

work voicemail

"hi, i'm calling regarding (information that my office had mailed to this patient). i don't really know what this is for, and was hoping that you could help me out. you can call me at work tomorrow at (xxx-xxx-xxxx). my name is (____), my account number is (xxxxxx) and my date of birth is (xx/xx/1944)... and please don't ask me that at work, because i won't say it out loud."

Posted on Friday, March 16, 2007 at 10:10AM by

mdog |

3 Comments

on writing

Seeing yourself in print is such an amazing concept: you can get so much attention without having to actually show up somewhere.

- from Bird By Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life, by Anne Lamott

Posted on Thursday, March 15, 2007 at 10:51PM by

mdog |

1 Comment

back to basics

ds: ...and she was just breastfeeding, a blanket draped over top. no big deal.
me: i know! i usually don't even notice.
ds: people think it has to happen in a closet or something.
me: yeah, i don't get what the big deal is.
ds: people get really uncomfortable with it.
me: especially guys. i want to say...
ds: it's natural!
me: "these are not just for you!"

Posted on Monday, March 12, 2007 at 10:23PM by

mdog |

5 Comments

ghost in the machine

i keep resetting the time on my computer and it KEEPS REVERTING BACK WHEN I'M NOT LOOKING. PLEASE STOP. am i going to have to do this until we get to The Artist Formerly Known As Daylight Savings Time?

Posted on Monday, March 12, 2007 at 09:36AM by

mdog |

6 Comments

touché

in the homestretch of moving some friends into their new place, i find myself carrying a largish convex piece of frosted glass, which belongs on their free-standing floor lamp.

me: so, where would you like me to put this -- what i like to affectionately call a boob lampshade?

aj [laughing loudly]: oh, just put it in the living room, right on top of the phallic object.

i don't know what i was expecting, exactly, but it wasn't that. totally awesome.

Posted on Friday, March 9, 2007 at 11:24PM by

mdog |

2 Comments

currently listening

ahhhhh... this takes me back.

released in '92[?!]. still a good cd. "plush"? awesome.

Posted on Friday, March 9, 2007 at 08:54AM by

mdog |

3 Comments

ponderings by proxy

"I can't say that I know for sure that believing has changed anything for me. Like, for example, I have a home to go home to. So do I have that because I believe? I mean, I realize that it's a blessing from God, but God in his infinite wisdom has seen fit to give lots of people domicile, believers and non. I can't say, 'I believe, therefore God has given me an affordable apartment.'

[...]

The best *difference* I can come up with is that believing gives me a framework that gives at least some meaning to the world. It gives me some metaphysical pegs on which to hang things. It gives me a metanarrative (oh yeah, I just went there), if you will. It kind of makes me think of CS Lewis and his whole, 'I believe in Christianity as I believe that the Sun has risen, not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.'"

[- visit meegs for more complete thoughts]

"[In college] I 'used' the bible a lot...reading it topically on subjects like baptism, predestination, homosexuality, women in ministry...mostly to prove the things I was being taught at the time (Which is strange if you think about it).

Back then, we called it 'defending our faith.' I'm not sure what I call it now."

[- visit paul for more complete thoughts]

Posted on Wednesday, March 7, 2007 at 10:35AM by

mdog |

chatty

i have nothing clever to write. gmail chatting has been pretty representative of my week though, so i will subject you to this. because i can.

sf: I dislike the Blogger system, I can never type the randomly generated letters right the first time
me: I KNOW
i feel brain damaged when that happens
me: is it a w? or two v's? p? q?
sf: lakjyewsex

me: how are things? i got your "happy christmas" text... in... january?
sjl: wait a second.
which happy christmas text?
the actual mail?
me: no, cell
sjl: ah yes! intentionally in January
me: i think that was you?
sjl: I think the text messages are fairly immediate
me: i figured! you are funny
so what is the deal with those? they cost the normal $.10?
fyi i am not wearing pants at the moment..
sjl: I believe that it costs me about $0.20
THANK YOU FOR THAT

my gmail status: working...?
sf's gmail status: writing...?
me: dost thou mock my gmail status?
sf: LOL... well, only if it weren't true
I am trying.. to write.. but
it's not happening
me: you're writing now!
sf: Good point
me: i suppose this doesn't count.
sf: not unless I can just plug in this transcript where the conclusion of my sermon is supposed to go
me: do you think anyone will buy a book of random gmail chats?
sf: we could just put it on screen
it would be like an abstract piece
me: i love it.
"and now i leave you with this... i don't think it needs any explanation"
sf: LOL
me: stand for closing prayer
sf: Let's worship together

b: the only thing is that it's one of the few complexes that allows animals
(no rabbits though :( )
me: so, rabbits don't count as "animals"??
b: get this...
they're exotic
me: um...
b: "no exotic animals (snakes, rabbits, ferrets)"
me: they're freaking rabbits.
b: I know
me: wtf
b: if you can catch one in the parking lot outside, they're not exotic

Posted on Sunday, March 4, 2007 at 10:46PM by

mdog |

3 Comments

oh come on

i came back from lunch to a voicemail from a phone book advertiser, stating that it was imperative for accounts payable to call them back by the end of the day, and could you please reference [this] account number when you call?

me: hi, i'm calling back about a voicemail regarding [this] account number.

her: yes, okay, i see... and this is an account for [one of our departments in another town].

me: ah, yeah, that's one of our departments.

her: can you verify the address for [this department]?

me: sure, it should be [official department address].

her: um... no.

me: no?

her: no.

me: uh, okay, then... how about [alternate department address].

her: um... that's not it either.

me: okay? it could be under [old department address]?

her: that's... no. i don't have that.

me: [shuffling through old bills] um, it could be [possibility #1]... or [possibility #2].

her: ah... no.

me: or [possibility #3]?

her: none of those are correct.

me: well, at this point i'm just guessing then.

her: i need to verify this address before releasing information on this account.

me [thinking]: WTF! YOU people called ME!!

me: look, i don't know what to do here. i'm just calling back. i don't know anything about this account.

her: well, i'm sorry i wasn't able to speak with you about this account. have a nice day.

she was very polite. but clearly this was a waste of time for the both of us. i mean, unless there's some sort of health information or secret cure for cancer embedded in this mysterious account for an apparently nonexistent physical location... this shouldn't be that difficult. seriously, what am i going to do, maliciously rack up advertising charges for some random company? ooooo, THAT'LL show 'em.

i'm never getting that time back.

Posted on Thursday, March 1, 2007 at 01:31PM by

mdog |

8 Comments